The wise woman builds her house,
but with her own hands the foolish one tears hers down.
Whoever fears the Lord walks uprightly,
but those who despise him are devious in their ways.
proverbs 14:1-2
Home is a word that God put on my heart several years ago.
Coming home to myself nested in my Savior
Being at home in my feminine body in its current state and as it ages
Cultivating a home environment that nourished my children and my husband
Investing in my home life, that makes me feel fulfilled and not in need of stimulation from the world outside
Remembering that home as a safe and nurturing space will forever be important to my children, even into adulthood
I remember the time in my life when I realized that a good portion of me was acting like the foolish woman, unwittingly tearing my home down in many subtle culturally-approved but still destructive ways.
I remember God opening my eyes, putting it on my heart to pray, “Give me eyes to see what you see,” and then in turn actually SEEING.
I remember saying goodbye to many activities, pursuits and habits that were telling me who I was, habits that were pulling me away from womanhood, motherhood, and servanthood.
It’s a gift these days to feel grounded in my job as a home-maker, home-builder.
It’s a moniker that gets a bad rap in so many ways for so many reasons, but I no longer care.
To have the simple metric for all decisions of:
Does this build my home or tear it down?
is giving me so much clarity and peace in this world.
My earthly home isn’t everything, it’s not my forever home and it can be taken away in an instant so its importance is never to trump my heart for eternity.
That being said, it is my current focus, responsibility, mission, ministry, and medium for working, growing, serving, loving, aging, following and living.
I would love to hear your thoughts on home, if you have any to share.
Xoxo,
Sarah
Your last bullet point about home being a safe and nurturing place for your children now *and* when they are adults -
Not judging or shaming, but I have noticeable unease when I visit my mom’s house (where I grew up, my parents divorced about 15 years ago when I was in college, my mom kept the house). I lived away at the end of nursing school for an internship, and when I returned, the home I loved and where I was nurtured was no longer the same, and shortly thereafter I purchased my own home. There are physical components that make it hard to feel comfortable, but more critically, the tone has changed over the years from one of nurture and family togetherness to things I don’t really need to name. I had never considered the importance of cultivating a safe and nurturing home throughout the entire lifespan of my kids (not a mom, yet), but wow, in looking at my own feelings and unease in my old home, I see how important it is. In contrast, my grandparents’ house is one that has sustained the same wonderful environment since I was a child!
One recent summer, at a family reunion, God showed me a similar message. My family is enormous, so family reunions are crazy and awesome. My grandmother birthed 9 children and each of those children had many of their own, so a couple years ago the horde of us pulled in my aunt's house and were hanging out in and around her pool. From across the pool I caught sight of my sweet grandma, on the porch quietly sitting and observing the absolute chaos that is 40+ people in the pool. She sat there contently smiling. At that moment, I saw it. A woman's treasure is not climbing the corporate ladder, it's not the mass of her social media following, it's not how successful her husband is or how perfectly scheduled and executed her day is. It's her children. (Not saying we have to have 9). But I felt like God was saying, be careful or you'll miss it. What a blessing, to be in her old age and looking out across the legacy she will soon leave behind on this earth. That's far more priceless than any amount of corporate success or individuality.